Author name: Philip Barton

It’s never good to bite your nails

As a bad impression lingers

But if you must, and all else fails,

Restrict it to your fingers.

 

© Copyright Philip Barton, 2010 All rights reserved

Some mozzies bit me
On the bottom.
I quickly smacked me,
Think I got’em.

© Philip Barton January 12^th, 2022. All rights reserved.

Putting on my underpants,

Wriggle, wriggle, wriggle.

Positioning is critical,

Jiggle, jiggle, jiggle.

 

Strutting down the street I go,

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle.

Forgot to put my trousers on,

Giggle, giggle, giggle.

 

© Copyright Philip Barton 2019 All rights reserved

A lifeless, woolly cardigan
Laid waste by fickle fates
Lies flattened on the road
Bound for the plain and pearly gates.

 

© Copyright Philip Barton February 20^th, 2025. All rights reserved.

It was the longest chip in the world,
This record would take some beating.
It was coming out of his bottom,
Before he’d finished eating.

 

© Copyright Philip Barton January 18^th, 2018. All rights reserved.