A writer’s like a jigsaw ace,
Each word’s position solved.
And when they’re in their proper place,
More wisdom has evolved.
There needs to be more writers
Making valuable additions,
As the world is full of fighters,
Utter twats and politicians.
© Copyright Philip Barton, 17th May 2018. All rights reserved.
I forget a lot, I think, these days,
But can’t remember what,
So is that still poor memory
When what was once is not?
© Copyright Philip Barton, January 8th, 2026, All rights reserved
Around a book I’m curled.
Off to bed when anyone shows.
I’m famous all over the world,
As the man that nobody knows.
© Copyright Philip Barton 8th July 2011. All rights reserved
My favourite word is ‘tweezers’
And odd to say, but true,
If you say it quite a lot of times
You’ll come to love it too.
© Copyright Philip Barton December 1st, 2009 All rights reserved
Jolly Richard, the office pirate,
Fumbles with a folder.
Golly Jolly who’s that polly,
Sitting on your shoulder?
That m’hearty is the Captain,
Bold and free and brave.
He dares to go where no man’s been,
Humankind to save.
His letter opener, razor sharp.
He fights the fight to win.
Slashing here, tongue lashing there,
And leading with his chin.
Captain Polly’s a cut above,
Your average multinationals,
He’ll fight the fight with young and old
Poltroons and blind irrationals.
The fights are savage, letters rage,
And damn the cost of stamps
His feathers ruffled, bloodied brow,
And cursed writer’s cramps.
But though battles still are loyally joined
Jolly Richard’s wise and older,
And sometimes wonders about the Captain,
Perched upon his shoulder.
© Copyright Philip Barton 14/9/01 All rights reserved
Never talk whilst you are eating.
Avoid a mouth that’s open wide.
And never use a shiny spoon
To try and look inside.
© Copyright Philip Barton August 3rd, 2003 All rights reserved
His drive for fame and fortune,
Was all he’d ever known.
He set the new world record,
For staring at a phone.
© Copyright Philip Barton, January 30th, 2026, All rights reserved
A Jewish magician
With a lot of ambition
Said ‘hey presto’
Let’s see you beat that.
With a wave and a flourish
And an ego to nourish
He pulled a Rabbi
Right out of his hat.
© Copyright Philip Barton Jun 6th 2006. All rights reserved.
I read until my eyes spin round
Then plop out squishy on the ground.
And then there’s nothing can be read
Until they’re poked back in my head.
© Copyright Philip Barton 12th May 2011. All rights reserved
